The kicker was that I did it again THE VERY NEXT DAY! So I’m not really sure when or where, but I came home today and off into thin air apparently. Poof! I must have looked around for close to 5 or 6 hours straight with no luck, and another 4 or 5 the second day. Quite frankly with the “interest” and “upgrades” I’ve put into it, I can imagine we’re pushing 2 or $3,000!
So I’m usually pretty good about finding things. I don’t have much to keep track of so when I’m missing something, especially this expensive, I tend to remember where it was, but unfortunately this wasn’t one of those days.
My Old Man had come to town earlier in the week and he was staying at home while I went to work and I came home to pick him up to go get something to eat. I pulled up to the driveway and just honked the horn and he came out the garage.
Driving away I realized that I left the automatic garage door open; I don’t usually do this, but I figured we’d be back in an hour, it’s lunchtime, no big deal [Insert ominous music of despair].
Upon returning home I noticed the door into the house *in* the garage was also open. It’s one of the doors that’ll shut only when you give it a little push you know? So the wind from the garage was blowing enough to keep it from shutting all the way.
And into the story comes Porky the Pug. We got Porky about 3 years ago as a pup and as annoying as he is, he is very good with the kids and overall has a really great temperament. I’ve always had a big dog in the past, but my wife was keen on getting a pug when she was pregnant with our 2nd kid.
Porky had just had a bath the day before so his collar with name-tag and all was missing in action for the day and he was just relaxing at home when I came to pick up dad for lunch; the stars must have been aligned as I *always* close the automatic garage door when I leave, the door will ONLY stay open if it has a breeze riding through to push it open, he’s usually got his collar on, and Porky rarely leaves his comfy doggy bed during the day, and out he went.
It reminded me of that kids show from the 80’s Milo and Otis – where the curious cat and a pug nosed pup take a journey around the countryside that eventually leads them back to their farm and live happily ever after. But Porky never came home.So I had spent 6 hours and 10 miles traipsing the neighborhood looking for the little turd and my wife comes home and within 15 minutes of her being home and starting to look, she heard a faint bark coming from behind our neighbors fence. Yea, he’d gone a total of about 50 feet and was just hanging out in our neighbors back yard.
Everybody was really happy to see him back, especially the kids. Mom was crying as everyone really missed him and realized that he was a big part of the family. I came to the conclusion that as much as he is a pain the butt, he was a pretty good dog and I was glad to have him back, until…
The Second Act
Now keep in mind we’ve never had him get out since we got him 3 years ago and lo and behold, not 24 hours after the first breakout he made his escape again. This time, same scenario but we were outside painting the step stools grampa made for the girls. I had the video camera and my dad was helping paint. Mom was in and out washing off the brushes, and coincidentally, so was Porky.
Yes, we had vowed to find his collar after what had happened, but we’d figured that it was once in 3 years, we could find it when we found it and we didn’t need to worry. Um, yea, until now.
Off we went again on our wild-goose chase for another 4 or 5 hours till it started getting dark.My legs were tired, really tired, and I was about to give up hope and couldn’t believe our horrid luck when I was on the way back to my house and I saw a piece of paper flapping in the wind by the community mailboxes.
“Surely this couldn’t be a note for the Porkster” as we call him, I thought to myself.
I walked up to the mailbox and sure enough the note said in big black letters “MISSING A PUG? Call me!” with the phone number of a nice lady who I called immediately to find that she had him at her house, get this, 3 doors down from mine.
Before I went to pick him up, I went to pick up a gift card from the pet store for the lady for finding him and I picked up a spare collar that he got immediately back on.
So in total I walked about 20 miles for 13 plus hours and Porky hadn’t gone more than 50 yards total in his 2 days of vacation. It’s funny because I never wanted to get Porky in the first place – my wife is the dog lover, but she coughed up the $1000 from her own stash and she had her heart set on him.
I had no intentions of ever enjoying the company of a little dog like Porky when my wife brought him home, but it’s amazing how pets with that kind of temperament can really grow on you – he’s a good boy and we’ve been treating him to good food the last few days to try to convince him to stay around for a bit longer.
Filed Under: Humor